Silence Is Not Golden

In The Art of Conversation, James Morris points out that although we “Realize that it is bad manners to monopolize a conversation, it’s equally bad manner not to talk enough.” The truth is, silence is not golden, it is missed opportunity when it comes to engaging with people. People want to be sought after. There is great worth that comes from others wanting to be around you. Leaders make it a point to always be the ones to take the high road and initiate interactions.

If you find yourself as one who is only being approached by others try and turn that around. Be proactive about connecting with people. Go to them first and initiate conversations and questions. When others see that you are giving your time to meet with them it means a great deal. Respect is earned when the other person feels that they are worth your effort. Being the initiator by proactively seeking others is a sure way to show others their value.

One of the most important elements of initiating conversation is having confidence in yourself. Without any self-esteem, you will struggle at connecting with others. Having confidence in yourself and who you are allows for courage to drive your conversations. If you find yourself doubting your worth, or questioning how interesting you are, take some time to know your strengths and uniqueness. Confident people succeed because they capitalize on their ability to make others feel comfortable in conversations.

When someone asks you a question you are obligated to respond within the terms of conversational etiquette. However, when you initiate questions towards others that is something you have chosen to do because you wanted to. People will feel valued and honored when you seek them out and take the first step to connect. Don’t be the kind of person that only speaks when spoken to. One of my mentors always taught me to have a list of starter questions ready to go at all times in order to connect with people on the fly. He knew the importance of being a people person when it comes to leadership and adding value to others.

Great leaders make others feel great.

So, be a conversation starter by challenging yourself to step out in boldness. Great leaders make others feel great. Be prepared to open up and know people more.