Life Coaching Tip: What Are You Expecting?
Often our expectations are based on our assumptions about people or groups of people. The same is true of us. Have you ever noticed how your expectations become a reality in your personal life? Expectation is literally a self-fulfilling prophecy. We do this consciously and subconsciously.
Remember the kid in grade school who was always really rowdy and disruptive (this could have been me…no comment)? Many times, if people assume they are perceived a certain way, that is precisely how they will act, even if they don’t mean to. The rowdy kid in grade school knew everyone perceived him as disruptive, so he was. The teacher expected terrible behavior, and the expectations were fulfilled time and time again.
Consider the profound impact this can have in your own life. Are the assumptions and expectations you have about yourself liberating or victimizing? There are countless examples of “self-fulfilling prophecies,” or the Law of Expectations at work in everyday life. For example, ever noticed how people who think they will be fired suddenly experience a drop in the quality and enthusiasm for their work? Then what happens? They get fired! Their belief causes them to act a certain way, and those expectations then work to bring about the very thing that at first was only a figment of their imagination.
In a social sciences study, second graders listened to statements from their teachers before taking a math test. There were three types of statements: expectation, persuasion, or reinforcement.
- The expectation statements went something like, “You know your math really well!” or “You work really hard at your math.”
- Persuasion statements involved sentences like, “You should be good at math.” or “You should be getting better math grades.”
- Finally, for the reinforcement statements, teachers said things like, “I’m really happy about your progress” or “This is excellent work!”
Now, what do you think the results were? The scores were the highest in the “expectation” category! Why were the expectation statements the most effective? They created personal assumptions within each student. Those assumptions conditioned the actual external results.
Your expectations will define your future, good or bad. So, what are you expecting?
Start to set your thoughts and hope in the direction of what you want to see happen. Fan the flame of your faith in future possibilities, and you’ll see opportunities open up around you.
